Well douche your snatch and let's go!
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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