Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Randomize
