At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
