i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
