never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Randomize
