the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
