What did we do last night that was yellow?
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
