Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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