Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I need to sanitize my soul.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
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