Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(503): View more from Oregon

the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.

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(315): View more from New York

You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.

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(813): View more from Florida

He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL

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(204): View more from Manitoba

I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover

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(303): View more from Colorado

I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.

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(778): View more from British Columbia

Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Heading there now. Already have a boner.

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