i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
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