I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Randomize
