On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
We were destined to go to rehab together
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
