i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
You are the jesus of drinking
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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