i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
