just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
