remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
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