I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize