Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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