I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
