oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I am naked and annoyed.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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