you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize