SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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