you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
