Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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