shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
