maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Found your dick twin last night
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
is it fun? or sober?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
