may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Randomize
