im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
