when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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