totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
