the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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