Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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