one word: firstdatebathroomanal
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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