I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize