i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
