she smelled like a LAN party
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Randomize