make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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