I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize