i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I want to be your penis for a week.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
