shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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