I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
