dude i'm inner monologue high
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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