just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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