I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize