I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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