Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Randomize
