its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize