last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Randomize
