So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
