Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Floor bacon is actually really good
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
