The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
